I had an interesting thought this morning.
I have been wondering since Andy died if I would go through the pain again, if I knew how it would end. Was our love worth it? Could I open my heart, knowing how it would be crushed into pieces?
I believe I have learned the answer. By opening my heart to love again, this proves that I am willing to endure the agony of loss. After all, now I honestly know how I can be ripped apart. I have lived the true meaning of "until death do us part." Love truly is worth the pain.
Therefore, my love for Arthur is a testimony of the strenghth of my love for Andy. That knowlege gives me peace.
I still cried for Andy yesterday. That is another testimony. Love is forever.
"...And I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end,
The way it all would go...
Our lives are better left to chance.
I could have missed the pain,
But I'd of had to miss the dance."
(Thanks to Garth Brooks for putting my feelings to words.)