One year. How could it be???One year since he left this life. Oh ... I didn't want him to die...
I remember the holding on... holding on... begging God, Jesus, Jehovah, the Universe, ANYBODY to not take him from me!! Cying, pleading... PLEASE!!! DON"T TAKE HIM FROM ME!! What about our children?? How can we go on! PLEASE!!
Then, it hit me like a brick. It was time to let go. Time to let his poor soul go to some place better. I think he reached this feeling at the same time, because he had been hanging on to life as tightly as I hung on to him.
It was about two or three nights before he died. The song that was popular at the time:
"Tomorrow's another day, and I'm thirsty anyway, so bring on the rain..."ran through my mind. I slept soundly that night for the first time in months. I really was letting him go...
I was the one who decided when it was time to stop the feeding as his body filled with fluid. I decided to let him slip gently away per his instructions, instead of attempting to recusitate him. He had written in his living will for me to decide when the time came.
I don't feel like I am holding him back from anything now... I released him from the wheelchair to fly on the wings of eagles...
"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary;
and they shall walk and not faint."
Isaiah 40:31
they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary;
and they shall walk and not faint."
Isaiah 40:31
1 comment:
Original comments from February, 2003
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Read what others had to say:
Kim - Feb 25, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
My prayers are with you...I know this may be a hard day to get through...
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Kathy - Feb 25, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
Happy Birthday Andy in that new beautiful place, where there are no wheelchairs and everybody looks and feels great! February 25, 2002 - eternity. Save me a seat!
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Andrea - Feb 25, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
This sure made me cry like a baby. I know he is having a blast chasing Phoenix. My prayers are with you all.
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Pam - Feb 25, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
I love you my friend.
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Gary- Feb 25, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
My thoughts and prayers are with you and the kids today and everyday. What a wonderful day it will be when we see Andy again.
Luv always.
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Margaret - Feb 26, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
Stephanie, Jim, Shelby, and John: I know you all are missing that very special man so very much. My heart and prayers are with you all.
Love you all , always! Mom & Grandma
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Piccola and Gene - Feb 26, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
Doesn't seem like a year has passed. Our prayers are with you and the family . Gene and Piccola
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Amy - Feb 27, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
Your friends from Michigan are thinking about you. Bless you all. Love keeps us all connected, both on this side and the other side.
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Elmer and Marilyn Whiteman - Feb 27, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
Lovely, lovely memorial, Stephanie
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Lesley and Billy - Feb 28, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
I can't believe its been a year already. Our thoughts and prayers are with you during this time as well as always.
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Stephanie - Mar 2, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
Thanks everybody, for all the wonderful love and support. It really doesn't seem like a year. I don't think it will ever seem like it...
We love you all....!
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Mary Kay and Cactus - Mar 3, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
He is terribly missed in all our lives, especially in his little family. You all are in our prayers now & always.
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Frances - Mar 7, 2003 Edit | Delete | Viewers | Reply to this item
Ok, I am crying like a baby. What makes me feel better, is that Daddy and my sweet son, Phoenix are having the time of their lives playing, visiting, looking down on all of us. Hopefully smiling. We love and miss you Daddy and Booger!!!
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