When blending two households into one...

...there are so many things to consider! Then just when things begin to fall into place, more things crop up that I never would have dreamed of.

Financially we decided it was best for Arthur to move into what has been "my" house. Suddenly, "my" house has to be "our" house, or Arthur ends up being a second class citizen where he resides. We plan on selling this house and purchase an "our" house, but it will take a bit of time to get this place ready to go on the market.

So enter new issues that did not occur to me until we moved Arthur's things here. Such as... how will the kids react to him in what used to be Daddy's spots? Not to mention how would I react? We solved some of those problems by having me taking over the empty spot at the table, and Arthur taking my spot. We are redecorating and changing the bedroom, and I now have what used to be Andy's everything... side of the room, side of the closet, side of the bed, everything. (Brand new everything, by the time we are done, by the way...)

Then there are financial issues. Inheritance issues. Family boundary issues. And issues such as: what constitutes "junk," and what are "treasures?" What kind of treasures are appropriate to keep, anyway? Personal space issues. Unresolved issues in our past relationships. (Naturally, even both of our happy previous marriages had every day type problems.) On top of that, there are the normal issues that face all newly married couples.

There are ongoing grief issues. We both have them, and we understand, but it can bring additional pain to our hearts out of empathy. We might experience an occcasional mild stab of jealousy. Things that don't even make sense, like regretting we will never have each other's child, like we need more kids or something!!!!

It is hard work, but it is worth it. Oh it is so worth it! I am still one thousand percent sure that we made the right decision.