Melancholy Relief

Today brought an end to all of the financial and legal dealings. My soul is completely worn out, but relieved as well. Arthur bought into this house, we finished up the transaction at the title company, and he and I are now co-owners. Both of us are sinking a good sum of money into remodeling during the next month.

The kids and I started moving and removing some of our old stuff to prepare for the remodel. There is one thing that has been frozen in time since Andy went to the hospital for emergency surgery in November of 2001. He had received a Louis L’Amour wall calendar the previous Christmas from Doug and Marilyn. I hung it on the dining room wall near his hospital bed and we changed it each month to the next piece of Western art. But from November on, time went into suspension. I brought him home from the hospital the following February, he died three days later, and I never changed the page.

This afternoon I finally took down the dusty calendar set on the month of November 2001, along with the dried flowers from some of his funeral arrangements, and it will never be placed on the wall again. I don’t know why it took me so long to do it. I also don’t know why there are days it feels to me like it's still November of 2001.







P.S. I didn't read the quotation on the page until after I published this post the first time. It seems almost like a message:

We must not lose touch with what we were, what we had been, nor must we allow the well of our history to dry up, for a child without tradition is a child crippled before the world. Tradition can also be an anchor of stability and a shield to guard one from irresponsibility and hasty decision.

It really is important to keep alive the history and tradition in our family, as well as to embrace the new blessings in our lives.