It seems to be getting worse lately. Maybe it is the stress of the current economy or something. But everywhere I go, people are jumping on others. I see it in the stores, in the parking lots, and at work. As hard as I try to avoid it, occasionally a jumper turns me into a jumpee. I don't like it!
I have been told, "Don't take what they say to heart, that is just how they are."
"The problem is you want validation, and you are hurt when you don't receive it."
"You are just too nice!"
That makes it very easy to continue to blame myself for other people's rude behavior.
It is apparent that it isn't just me on the receiving end of the dirty stick. I see the sad look and the defeated attitude of many around me, often caused by the same perpetrators.
Yet, the same solution is repeated to them: "You have to understand, that is just how they (the mean people) are, they are not going to change."
Huh? Let me get this straight.
We who are sensitive are supposed to grow a thicker skin, those who are cruel are supposed to be allowed a pass.
I have decided, starting today, to make sure I truly am treating others the way I wish to be treated. After that, am not going to run from my sensitivity, rather I am going to embrace it. I hope others will join me! If it makes cruel people uncomfortable when feelings get hurt, maybe they will learn something! :)
7 comments:
You make an excellent point. Mind if I join you?
Sure! Somebody has even designed t-shirts and stuff for our club:
Mean People Suck T-shirts
Oh, sorry, these items are kind of mean themselves, so perhaps we shouldn't use them. I'm trying to stay positive! :)
I've noticed the same thing. Nice people must always be nice, even about mean, nasty people. Mean people on the other hand, get major applause if they do any half way decent thing even when it's for their own benefit.
Yep, it's just not right, but I find those mean people, so, well, mean, that I'd have to wait until I knew I could cope with the outfall before I took one on. That's not right either, but it's the way it is.
Ali - who's glad she's not alone in being annoyed with the meanies.
Great post. I agree with you whole heartedly. I'm one of those sensitive souls who has been told I need b**** lessons. Ouch. I don't want to be that way.
I saw a bumper sticker that said, "Mean people need Prozac."
Yep, they need something.
A few days before Christmas, something happened with one of the murder cases I follow, and it was bad enough that I figured I needed chocolate to get through the afternoon. I stopped at a Dollar General near work, and picked up the BIGGEST box of chocolates I could find. Standing in line, I let loose a sigh when two women in front of me were bickering with the cashier over the amount of discount they had coming on a $1 ornament. The younger woman turned to me and said, "You got a problem?" I said, "Well, as a matter of fact, yes. I'm about to be late for work!" She said, "You know what, lady? Sh*t happens! You need to get over it!" I said, "Thank you for saving me from two and a half pounds of chocolate!" and set it down and walked out.
Which was a LOT nicer than I wanted to be!
You must shop at the same store that I do! LOL...I had a similar thing happen to me last summer.
http://okwildlady.blogspot.com/2008/07/well-alrighty-then.html
I also had a man try to run my son and I over at the Home Depot because he was mad that our cart got in the way he wanted to drive. Maybe we are just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but it seems like there is a severe lack of civility these days.
(((hugs))) about the murder trials. Those news stories just reinforce my belief that there is something seriously wrong with people today.
Stella, I have been told I'm too nice many times. And only recently I had to defend myself for that to one of my best friends. But actually, I don't want to change. It's just me, I'm nice, I'm sweet. Yes, people do take advantage now and then of me, but I also get a lot of love back from others, just because I am who I am. I'll live with it, it's OK.
Tanja
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