Another crazy family story! (With this family, we'll never run out.)

I will never forget the Christmas holidays of 1990. It wasn't so much the holidays themselves, or even the fact that my second-born child was due any second. The happenings on the day Shelby was born are simply unforgettable.

It all started the night before. Kathy and her kids, 16 year-old Chris and 14 year
old Lesley, were over for the holidays. We all had a pleasant visit, fairly unremarkable except for the fact that I was so pregnant that I couldn't get comfortable. As they prepared to leave at about 10 PM, Chris invited Jimmy to spend the night, since Lesley also had a friend coming over. My son thought it over and decided he would rather stay home with all of his Christmas goodies, so they left and we all went to bed shortly after. Later, Jimmy had good reason to thank the Lord that he had made that decision....

At 2 AM the phone rang, and I rolled over and picked up. It is almost never a good thing to get a call at that hour, and that night was no exception.

"Hello?"

"Hello Ma'am. This is the Oklahoma County Sheriff's Department. We are trying to reach a Kathy R. Do you have any idea how we can get in touch with her?"

No, this was not sounding good. Not at all.

"Well, she left here about two hours ago with her kids. As far as I know she was going straight home."

"We have been calling her house because we have her children Chris and Lesley in custody. If we can't find a responsible family member to come get them I am going to have to take them to Juvenile Hall."

What the heck???? "I can come get them, but I have no idea why Kathy isn't answering the phone."

"Normally we would have just taken them to jail, but I could tell these kids aren't your typical delinquents when when we pulled her friend over, and Lesley jumped out of the station wagon waving her hands in the air crying, "Don't shoot me! Don't shoot me!"

Aha, it was becoming clear now. They had taken Kathy's car on a joy ride! The only one of the three that was even old enough to drive was Chris, and not only did he not have his license yet, he hadn't even taken driver's ed.


"Are you sure you can come get them? They gave me some long rambling story about how their aunt is 9 months pregnant and her husband can't walk."

"I AM 9 months pregnant and my husband CAN'T walk, but he drives with hand controls. We will come get them!"

Andy and I dressed in record time, we loaded his wheelchair into the truck, and we were off. But the first stop was Kathy's house to see if we could roust her out of bed. She answered the door in a state of complete sleep disorientation.

"Wha... what are you doing here at this hour?" she sputtered.

I replied, "The sheriff has been trying to call you. Do you know where your kids are? Do you know where your car is?"

Kathy went over to the sleeping bags on the floor and pulled the covers back. Nothing but pillows. She checked her phone. The kids had turned the ringer off. "That's it. THAT'S IT!!! Those kids are dead meat!!" She threw a robe on over her pajamas. "Just WAIT 'til I get my hands on those little @$$#*&%$!!!"

We delivered Kathy to her children, her car, and the sheriff, and stuck around just long enough to make sure that we weren't going to have to post bail for Kathy assaulting her children. The last thing I heard was Kathy yelling, "I'm going to rip your arms off and kill you both with the bloody stumps!" and the sheriff's reply, "Sounds like it may be justifiable homicide, kids."

Then Andy and I returned to our nice, warm bed and went back to sleep.

Except, about every half hour to 45 minutes I woke up slightly, thinking... ow, I hurt. Ow... I hurt.....

By 7:30, it was obvious I was in full blown labor.

10 hours and a big bag of Skittles later, Miss Shelby Dylane came into the world.

And, the rest is history. :)

A very lucky Jimmy


Chris and Lesley in the waiting room while I was in labor, the little turds.


Shelby is born!!!


Introducing Baby Girl Shelby Dylane: 6:36 PM, 8 lbs, 7oz, 20" long. :)

P.S. A very happy, and hopefully much less eventful, 20th birthday to my daughter!