This is our 8th Christmas since Andy died. Yesterday, for the very first time since, I saw real, honest-to-goodness joy about the upcoming holiday from my son John. (He's 15 now, by the way...!)As a matter of fact, out of all of us John has had the hardest time finding his footing in this dreadful storm. He rarely has exhibited enthusiasm about much of anything, it's more like he has been going through the motions of being a kid for the past 8 years. He never totally crashed and burned, but always verged somewhere between melancholy and sullen. Over the years I tried, Shelby tried, then later Arthur tried to help him, but to no avail. Last night, though, something woke up in him. It was like somebody had lit a fire under him!
It started when we were going through some old ornaments that had been misplaced. Some of them were old family decorations, and his spirit was noticably brighter with each one we took out.
"I remember when Daddy used to always play with these trains. And, wow, Mom! I haven't seen this in years! It was always my favorite. And this one always reminded me of magic... and here is that old styrafoam thing that I always loved..."
Hopefully, this change in John will be a lasting one. I was astonished that he actually started singing a Christmas song as he hung ornaments! Our house has not been decked out so much in years.
Some of the ornaments had belonged to Arthur and his late wife Sue, and John asked questions about them as he hung them up. Arthur is not much for decorating, and had been watching TV in the bedroom oblivious to all the activity in the living room. But when he finally came out to investigate, John did something on his own that brought tears to my eyes.
He said, "Hey Arthur! I saved a couple of Sue's ornaments for you to hang and a spot to hang them."
Yes, we are honestly now a family. A blended family, but real none-the-less.
Peace and blessings to all.
5 comments:
What a gift for the season!
It's great to see such progress. The one thing I never wanted to see happen was that losing their mom so young would hamper our girls in living their lives (even though they were already both young adults). Sometimes, I guess, it just takes the passage of time for any of us to reconcile ourselves to our new lives and then determine what we want to do with the rest of it.
Thanks for sharing Stella!
This is a beautiful and inspiring post. It is the true gift of hope, family and love. All the things most important!
What a lovely, fantastic post and sentiment! I'm so glad that John is coming home, and that you feel like a family now/again.
That's fantastic. Thanks so much for sharing. These are the things which make the season wonderful.
Merry Christmas.
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